thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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