im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
No...this little piggys going to the bar
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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