bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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