my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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