Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Randomize
