She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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