He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
