maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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