Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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