I'm really into asian looking animals
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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