sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize
