Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
