Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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