The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
