i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
i think im in europe. pls send help
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
