Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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