i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Randomize
