We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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