Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
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