rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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