WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
