hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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