just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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