She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize