white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
