no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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