watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
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