this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
soo... how was my night?
Randomize