I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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