She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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