You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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