where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize