Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
