you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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