upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
