Your face is a jimmy john
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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