Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Randomize