no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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