i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
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