Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
How does one acquire holy water?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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