Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize