Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
