I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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