You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
