Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i just made my gag reflex go away.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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