we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
