my mouth tastes like poor choices
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
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