That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
