Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
