Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
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