Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize