If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
My feet surprised me
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